Katy Perry Rubs Shoulders With MJ?

Yesterday afternoon, when I heard "Firework" for the umpteenth time, Katy Perry again confirmed herself as my very worst musical fear: an empty, vacuous pop star with little to no redeeming talent. Maybe that’s somewhat of an exaggeration—I will make no pretensions to the-end-of-popular-music-as-we-know-it or similarly morose observations—but an explication of this view ought to be saved for another post. (You’ll notice, however, that despite my dislike of her, this is the second time I’ve mentioned Perry on Pueblo Waltz; while not my favorite musician, she does provide fertile ground for the musical criticism.)

All of that, however, is preamble to the fact that on August 17, Perry became the first female artist and only the second musical artist in history to have five singles off the same album all hit the #1 spot on the Billboard Hot 100 charts—“California Gurls,” “Teenage Dream,” “Firework,” “E.T.,” and “Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)” off of her album Teenage Dream.

 The only other artist that can claim that honor is the late Michael Jackson, off his album Bad. Those singles? You’d probably be able to pull those out of the memory banks far faster than the five duds from Perry; in their order of release: “I Just Can’t Stop Loving You,” “Bad,” “The Way You Make Me Feel,” “Man In The Mirror,” and “Dirty Diana.” Note that FM-radio favorite “Smooth Criminal”—and, retrospectively, one of Jackson’s greatest songs—it hit #7 on the charts.

Perry’s next single “The One That Got Away” is slotted for a release date of October 11, just a little less than a month away. If it charts (which it will), it stands a serious chance at hitting the #1 spot.

~

It makes me uneasy to see Perry sitting in statistical equality with Michael Jackson. Of course, no one out there is explicitly offering any blow-by-blow analysis of why Perry’s music itself is the equal (or even anywhere close) to that of Jackson’s, but—in our society anyway—statistics tend to hold not a status as markers of something like “cultural value.” If she/he/they sold that many albums/songs/books, [blank] must be good, right?

Let’s speak statistics—briefly. I think we’re all very comfortable with the best-selling artists of all time. You can debate them all you like, but the top three are certainly Elvis Presley, The Beatles, and our aforementioned friend Michael Jackson, not necessarily in that order. Musical snob that I often am, even I am comfortable with that trifecta; they are all visionaries of modern musical history, each artist, I would contend, with an influence comparable to the other. The statistics, in other words, reinforce our conception of what it means to be popular. We know The Beatles are the greatest band of all time almost implicitly…but it helps to see them right at the top in terms of album sales. It’s almost like a professor patting us on the back after a correct answer. We knew we were right, but we feel so much more right with that last little confirmation.

I should insert here that I am in no way suggesting that Perry is closing the ranks on these three in terms of either album sales, influence, or musical talent. She is still far, far away and, if anything, I would argue, based off her current body of work, that she’ll never even come close. Even formidable acts like Led Zeppelin and The Eagles still stare disconsolately at those large album sale.

~

But let’s look again at that ominous statistic now split between Perry and Jackson. While I find some statistics (see above) “comforting” in that semi-absurd way, some of them need to be taken down to size. They never mean as much as we'd like them to. Sadly, these notions of "cultural value" aren't entirely vested in album sales...despite how much easier that would make musical arguments for some people. "Cultural value" usually takes other forms.

For instance, no one needs to be told that Radiohead is one of the most influential bands currently in existence…and yet in terms of album sales, their album sales are dwarfed by those of The Spice Girls (an estimated 75 million albums to an est. 30 million albums). Not even Marshall Mathers (with an est. 80 million albums sold as Eminem) would lay a claim to the popular influence currently held by Yorke and co. 

~

So what to do with this troubling statistic being battled for by Perry? Personally, I’ll be hoping that Adele’s fantastic “Rolling In The Deep” will make a late-game comeback up the charts and take over the #1 spot so that Perry can’t steal the statistical spotlight entirely away from Jackson. Take that, Katy. And oh…if we’re playing the statistics game…how many has Teenage Dream sold? It’s hit platinum? Cool! Oh… Thriller sold…what? only 110 million? Don’t worry, Katy…someday you’ll catch up! (...)